The Power of Forgive and Forget: A Biblical Perspective

In a world quick to hold grudges and replay old wounds, the call to “forgive and forget” stands as a radical act of grace. This phrase, often tossed around in self-help circles, finds its deepest roots in Scripture. The King James Bible doesn’t use the exact words “forgive and forget,” but it paints a vivid picture of God’s mercy toward us—and the mercy He expects us to extend to others. Let’s explore what the KJV teaches on forgiveness, the challenge of forgetting, and how both transform our lives.

God’s Example: Forgiveness Without Record-Keeping

The foundation of biblical forgiveness is God’s treatment of our sins. He doesn’t merely pardon; He erases the evidence.

“As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.” (Psalm 103:12, KJV)

Imagine measuring the distance from east to west—it’s infinite. That’s how thoroughly God separates us from our sins once we repent. No ledger, no replay reel.

The prophet Micah echoes this:

“He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.” (Micah 7:19, KJV)

Sins sunk to the ocean floor, never to resurface. This isn’t amnesia; it’s deliberate choice. God chooses not to remember our sins against us.

“For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more.” (Hebrews 8:12, KJV, quoting Jeremiah 31:34)

Our Mandate: Forgive as We’ve Been Forgiven

Jesus makes the connection explicit in the Lord’s Prayer:

“And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” (Matthew 6:12, KJV)

This isn’t a suggestion—it’s a condition. Our forgiveness from God hinges on our willingness to forgive others. The parable of the unforgiving servant drives this home (Matthew 18:21-35). A king forgives a servant’s massive debt, yet that servant refuses to forgive a fellow servant’s tiny debt. The result? The king revokes his forgiveness.

Peter once asked Jesus how often he should forgive—seven times? Christ’s answer:

“Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.” (Matthew 18:22, KJV)

That’s 490 times—not a literal count, but a picture of limitless forgiveness. The math isn’t the point; the heart is.

The Hard Part: Forgetting

Human memory doesn’t work like God’s. We remember betrayals, harsh words, broken trust. So what does “forgetting” mean in practice?

The King James Bible never commands us to “forget” in the sense of erasing all memory of a wrong, nor would such a directive be realistic for finite, fallible minds. Human memory is stubborn; it clings to images, words, and wounds like burrs to wool. What Scripture does insist upon—and what is entirely within our power—is how we handle the memory once it surfaces. The practical heart of biblical forgiveness lies not in amnesia, but in deliberate, Spirit-empowered response to the transgression.

When the injury flashes across the mind’s eye, we are not required to pretend it never happened. We are required to refuse it the throne. Paul models this in Philippians 3:13 (KJV): “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before…” The Greek word for “forgetting” (ἐπιλανθανόμενος) does not mean total memory loss; it means ceasing to be influenced by. Paul still remembered the Christians he once persecuted—he wrote about it!—yet he refused to let that past define his present calling or poison his future hope.

Practically, this looks like:

1. Refusing to rehearse the offense as a weapon.“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.” (Ephesians 4:31, KJV) Bitterness is the mental replay button. Every time the memory loops, we choose: Will I nurse the grievance or release it to God?
2. Replacing accusation with intercession. Jesus commands, “Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you” (Luke 6:28, KJV). Prayer shifts the focus from the wound to the Healer, and from the offender’s guilt to their need for the same mercy we’ve received.
3. Guarding the relationship without denying reality. Joseph never forgot his brothers’ betrayal (Genesis 50:15–21), yet he spoke kindly, provided lavishly, and refused retaliation. Memory remained; malice did not. This is “forgetting” in action—not ignorance of the past, but mastery over its power.
4. Choosing daily to “cover” rather than “uncover.”“Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins.” (Proverbs 10:12, KJV) Love does not broadcast the fault; it shields the relationship while still acknowledging truth. This is the difference between gossip and grief, between vengeance and vigilance.

Forgetting, then, is less about the mind’s hard drive and more about the heart’s steering wheel. The scar may remain, but the sword is laid down. The memory may knock, but it is no longer given the keys. This is the practical, daily exercise of forgiveness: not the impossible erasure of the past, but the decisive refusal to let the past erase the future.

The Bible models choosing not to bring up past offenses. Joseph, sold into slavery by his brothers, later says:

“But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive. Now therefore fear ye not: I will nourish you, and your little ones. And he comforted them, and spake kindly unto them.” (Genesis 50:20-21, KJV)

Joseph doesn’t pretend the betrayal didn’t happen. He acknowledges it but refuses to let it define their future relationship. That’s biblical forgetting—releasing the right to punish or resent.

Paul puts it this way:

“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13-14, KJV)

Forgetting here means refusing to let the past paralyze the present. It’s forward motion.

When Forgiveness Feels Impossible

Some wounds cut too deep. Abuse, betrayal, violence—these aren’t easily dismissed. The Bible doesn’t demand we minimize pain or rush reconciliation. It does demand we release bitterness.

“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32, KJV)

Notice the order: put away bitterness first, then forgive. This often requires time, counseling, and God’s grace. Forgiveness doesn’t always mean restored relationship—sometimes it means releasing the offender to God while protecting healthy boundaries.

The Fruit of Forgive and Forget

When we truly forgive and release the past:

1. Peace replaces torment – “Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.” (Psalm 119:165, KJV)
2. Relationships heal – Joseph’s family was preserved through forgiveness.
3. We reflect God’s character – “Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.” (Luke 6:36, KJV)

A Final Challenge

Who holds a piece of your heart hostage through unforgiveness? A parent? A spouse? A friend? The KJV offers no loopholes:

“For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (Matthew 6:14-15, KJV)

Forgive and forget isn’t weakness—it’s the strongest act of faith. It’s choosing God’s way over our wounded pride. Start small. Pray for those who hurt you. Ask God to help you see them as He does—broken people in need of grace, just like us.

The east is still infinitely far from the west. That’s how far God has removed your sins. Will you extend that same measure to others?